I remember exactly how I felt when I realized I was pregnant. Surprise. I was in a small clinic similar to Immediate Care or Concentra having gone there because I just felt ‘off’. I remember explaining my symptoms to the very young doctor – he had black hair and round glasses and he looked about 12.
“Bloated, queasy, tired, peeing all the time!” – I remember the young doc smiled and said, “Could you possibly be pregnant?”
Well, yes. Yes I could. And I was.
Symptoms of pregnancy differ for every person but there are a lot of them that all of us share.
A missed period – There are other reasons a period has been missed or late such as illness, stress, or strenuous exercise. But if you have missed your period and it’s been at least one week since it should have arrived pregnancy may be something to consider. Taking a pregnancy test earlier than at least 7-10 days from your missed period could result in a negative or false-positive result.
Breast Changes – Your breasts may feel sore or tender and even slightly larger. Yes, larger! But again, not every woman will experience these changes but it’s something to be on the lookout for.
Morning Sickness – This is the one you hear about most often but to be frank, not everyone experiences it. In fact, I had the queasiness in the evening, not the morning! It passes though and soon you want pickles, corn nuts and Fanta….all together.
Sense of Taste and Smell – certain foods and drinks may taste different to you. The smells of certain foods may suddenly be unappealing! And suddenly you want a bowl of Rice Chex cereal every day when before you were a toast and Latte kinda gal.
Tiredness – suddenly you just want to sleep. All. The. Time. Your body is working harder and your heart rate elevated – this in turn may cause you to feel fatigued.
Urinary Changes – You may have to go every other hour and consider wearing adult diapers.
You may experience all, some, or none of these symptoms – we’re all different. But bottom line it’s normal. Some days will be better than others. Women have been experiencing and getting through pregnancy since the dawn of time. Women are one of the most resilient of souls!
If you suspect you may be pregnant and need help – call us or come see us. We can help confirm your pregnancy, talk about your situation, and listen to your concerns. You were not meant to do this alone.
There has always been and will always be men who take the results of procreation for granted and do not see it for the wondrous gift it really is.
There could be many reasons but let’s focus on just one for now. As one guy said it when asked what stops him from accepting fatherhood, “Not being a good father. I know what it’s like to not have a father, and I don’t want to repeat the cycle.”
There you have it. It may not be the number one reason but it’s a pretty big one and a common one at that. That’s not to say every guy who grew up without a dad can’t be a good dad but, well, it’s hard. Even with a great example to learn from and shadow there will be times every dad will make mistakes, be afraid, and wish he could go back to when times were simpler. Because let’s face it, being a parent is a roller coaster of thoughts, emotional and physical challenges, worries, firsts and lasts, and general blissful beautiful chaos.
So – what do you do when you are expecting and the father is not interested?
I can tell you from experience that if being one parent in a two parent unit isn’t always easy then being the only parent in the unit can sometimes be a tough road to travel. But notice I said sometimes.
Sometimes things are hard. A lot of times maybe. But not always. Sometimes as a single parent the closeness you feel with your child is so profound you wonder how you went this long without it. Sometimes the bond you share with her shows itself to be the glue that holds it all together. Sometimes the days when your only interactions are with her turn out to be when the sweetest conversations happen.
Sometimes when the will to continue on seems impossible the ease with which you can place your focus on her which in turn calms your fears is a gift in itself. Sometimes despite the rush of the day, the schoolwork and half written grocery list, the load of laundry you keep forgetting in the washer, the party you had to skip (again) because she’s got a little pea creative dance recital, make you wonder and wish you were not doing this alone.
But. You. Are. Not. Alone. You have her and the knowledge that there is someone counting on you. Needing you. Loving you unconditionally. Accepting you. Watching for you. And glad you are there. Those are powerful motivators to keep your head up and your focus clear.
The role of a mother is very different from that of the father. And every role is important and gifted. But not every success story has both. You cannot make him want to be the father he already is by virtue of the pregnancy. But you can be the mother she needs.
“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” –Maya Angelou
Throughout history there have been some extraordinary women for sure. Women who have shattered and soared above the proverbial glass ceiling. Many of their names and accomplishments have gone down in history. Their bravery, ingenuity, and compassion are unparalleled. Not many could argue that their lives were then and are now something to aspire to and celebrate. One not so tiny detail I might add is that many of these women were mothers.
Here are seven mothers who challenged the status quo.
Oveta became director of the Women’s Army Corps during World War II. She achieved the rank of colonel and was the first woman in the army to be a commanding officer. She was also the first woman to receive the Distinguished Service Medal.
“Women who stepped up were measured as citizens of the nation, not as women…This was a people’s war, and everyone was in it.”
Oveta Culp Hobby (1905-1995) Mother of two.
Known as the “Mother of Modern Physics”. Scientist Marie Curie is the first woman to win a Nobel Prize, she also raised her two young daughters alone after her husband died in an accident in 1906.
“Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained.”
Marie Curie (1867-1934) Mother of two.
In 1826, Sojourner Truth and her baby daughter escaped slavery in Ulster County, New York but still were without her five-year old son, Peter. Truth raised money for a lawyer, filed a complaint in court, and successfully got Peter out of slavery. This case in which a black woman successfully sued a white man in court went onto be a landmark case in history. Truth went on to become a Christian preacher in New York City speaking about the Bible, abolition, and women’s suffrage.
“Life is a hard battle anyway. If we laugh and sing a little as we fight the good fight of freedom, it makes it all go easier. I will not allow my life’s light to be determined by the darkness around me.” – Sojourner Truth
Sojourner Truth (1797-1883) Mother of five
A Polish employee at the Warsaw Social Welfare Department, Irena smuggled 2500 Jewish children out of the Warsaw Ghetto during the Holocaust, saving their lives. Sendler received Poland’s Order of the White Eagle award in 2003.
“If you see a man drowning, you must try to save him even if you cannot swim.”
Irena Sendler (1910—2008) Mother of three.
Founder of Mary Kay Cosmetics in 1963, a billion-dollar cosmetics company. Mary Kay was a single mom and worked from home in sales. Repeatedly passed over for promotions she launched her own cosmetics company.
“Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn’t be able to fly, but the bumble bee doesn’t know it so it goes on flying anyway.”
Mary Kay Ash (1918—2001) Mother of three.
Kathy Headlee, a mother of seven (the youngest of whom she adopted from Romania), started Mothers Without Borders to help orphaned children. Mothers Without Borders has sent volunteers to help children in multiple places such as Bolivia, Bosnia, Guatemala, India, Mexico, Zimbabwe, Uganda, and Nepal.
“If that person can manage their struggles and suffering perhaps I can too.”
Kathy Headlee – Mother of seven.
Dana Suskind, M.D (1968- ) Mother of three.
Dr. Dana Suskind, a widowed mother of three, is a pediatric surgeon at the University of Chicago who founded the Thirty Million Words Initiative to encourage parents to talk to their babies.
“Parent talk is probably the most valuable resource in our world. No matter the language, the culture, the nuances of vocabulary, or the socioeconomic status, language is the element that helps develop the brain to its optimum potential. In the same way, the lack of language is the enemy of brain development.”
No one ever said being a mother is easy. Is it possible to be a great mother and have a decent job? Well what is your definition of a great mom? One who makes sure there are clean clothes and snacks? One who helps with homework and sends cupcakes to class? One who sits in the cold rain sipping lukewarm joe on a soggy Saturday morning watching six-year-olds chase a muddy ball? One who will hear a whimpering child at 3am and whose warm arms will keep you safe? Yes – all of those things. And many more.
What about a decent job? In retail? Business? Healthcare? Banking? Education? A cook? A receptionist? A bus driver? In the military? Still a student? An astronaut? A writer? Any and all jobs that provide for you and your children are decent jobs. Finding work life balance is achievable.
Some of the mothers mentioned her were in tough situations. Poor, widowed, marginalized. But their determination for their work pushed them forward whether they asked for it or not. Their love for their children didn’t stop them or even slow them down but in fact propelled them into action where, under different circumstances, they may have given in.
It’s official, Next Step Pregnancy Services has a new home ~ and we are excited to learn what the future holds for us and the men and women we serve.
In addition to all the great free services we have provided for many years, such as: pregnancy testing, limited OB ultrasounds, assistance with material goods and community resource referrals, we now have the room to expand our programs and services to include a variety of classes, support groups and mentoring programs. We have a beautiful conference room at our new office and we want to use it!
Come and check us out, we’re in the classic brick building at 19526-64th Ave W in Lynnwood.
There is confidence and strength in making an informed decision and there are many things to consider and think about when you are experiencing an untimely pregnancy. At Next Step, we can help you with many of the things you are wondering about. Check out the top 5 reasons to visit us before you decide:
Our services are completely confidential. At Next Step, we strive to help women with their situation. We understand that each woman is facing different obstacles and we are here to assist you at this time in your life. Please know that everything we talk about and anything you want us to know is confidential to the fullest extent possible. You are safe talking to us.
We provide judgement-free, medically accurate services in a professional, yet friendly setting. At Next Step, we want to help you in every way we can.
All of our services are FREE. Along with our pressure-free environment, we want to make sure every woman has access to our services, no matter their financial situation or insurance. And, we don’t make any money based on your decision.
We can confirm a viable pregnancy. When looking for an abortion, it is important to know your pregnancy is viable. Our licensed medical staff is here to perform a diagnostic medical ultrasound to provide you with all the information that you need.
Our nurses can answer all your questions that you might have regarding pregnancy, including: pregnancy options, abortion information, sex, contraception and really anything that’s on your mind.
You are intelligent, strong and bold. You can overcome anything that life throws your way. YOU GOT THIS!
You see two lines on that little piece of plastic and you feel like your world just came crashing down. So many thoughts going through your head right now. Here’s the thing, chances are you have some time to stop and really think about what the best thing is for YOU, so take some deep breaths and think about what YOUR next step should be.
We are here to help you through this process. Realizing it sounds cliche to say “we’re here for you”, we really are. There are as many scenarios, complications and obstacles as there are fish in the sea when it comes to an unplanned pregnancy and Next Step is a safe place for you to come and tell your story. We are bound by HIPPA and Privacy Laws to keep everything confidential but we are bound by care and compassion to help you to feel safe and important.
Your decision is your decision, just make sure you make the one that is right for you.
Are you wondering what else we do at Next Step besides free pregnancy testing and diagnostic OB ultrasounds?
Next Step is a pregnancy resource center helping with all things baby!
From maternity clothes to potty chairs! Because we know how difficult it can be at times making ends meet ~ and we want to help fill the gap. Besides the more than 5000 diapers a month we give to parents in need, we give away thousands of other items like maternity clothes, baby clothes, formula, strollers – literally everything baby except cribs and car seats and we have referrals to other community agencies if you need one of those!
Why do we do this?
Because we want to help single moms and families. There are not strings attached no classes to take and no income requirements. We figure that if you are here asking for diapers and baby clothes it’s because you need diapers and baby clothes – and you will be treated with kindness and respect.
How do we do this?
We are able to offer these services and supplies, completely free of charge because of donations and support we receive from others in the community – the Lynnwood Food Bank will often donate formula, diapers and baby food, the Lynnwood Senior Center Knitters will often donate beautiful handmade blankets, the Lynnwood Value Village donates lots of bigger items like highchairs, bouncy seats and exersaucers and many local churches have supply drives and bring us carloads of diapers and wipes.
Everything we give away has been given to us.
If you are in need of baby supplies, know someone who is or want to donate to a very good place, please contact our office!
You are a unique individual with ideas, thoughts and dreams all your own. There is no other person alive now, who was alive in the past or that will be born in the future that will replicate your uniqueness. Your story began at the time you were conceived – when your DNA came to life. Of course certain traits were passed on to you from your parents and other family members, but you became you when that DNA was activated!
At Next Step, we know everyone is different and if you don’t want to be pregnant you have your reasons. An unplanned pregnancy brings with it a lot of potential emotions ranging from fear to anger. We are here to listen to you and to help you work through your path. We are pro YOU! Each and every person who walks through our front door is the most important person and no matter what you come in for, you will not be judged, criticized, or tricked.
If you think you might be pregnant and need to know for sure, Next Step Pregnancy Services is a safe place for you to come. All your information is completely confidential and everything is free so nothing will be sent to your (or your parent’s) insurance company either.